Building courage for our Generation C-kids
Woah, how did the year get into October? Isn’t it mad to realise that we have effectively spent more of the year (6 to 8 months depending on when you start counting) living with the pandemic?
And we’re still not quite out of the woods after the outbreak of Covid-19 globally early this year. The prolonged and life-altering effect of the virus on society can be seen even on kids. They mask up every day and grow up learning concepts like “social distancing”.
Social scientists and researchers have also started looking the impact of Covid on these kids termed ‘Generation C’ . Some see it as young as babies born into a time of Covid who will never know a life without the pandemic; others position it as a cohort of six to 16-year-olds who experience first hand the anxiety and worries of living with a virus, where risk is less tolerable and holidays, people and places carry an invisible threat.
So how can we help navigate this new world where it’s harder to be brave? One old-fashioned, overlooked way can help. That is story-telling.
We speak to the most positive person and story-teller extraordinaire we know, PositiveLeePeilin, on how the traditional bed-time routine can help build our kids the best amour for their times.
Peilin is a gifted story-teller who naturally bonds with kids using stories in her workshops.
Many Singaporean parents already love getting books for kids. Besides getting kids to read, why is story-telling such an important habit?
There are so many merits to storytelling!
Firstly, storytelling helps children make the connection between the written and spoken word. I usually run my finger across the words when reading to young children. This link is crucial in helping children understand how the letters they see are also words with sounds.
Secondly, storytelling helps your child practices many skill-sets, beyond the sense of sight and hearing as she is watching and listening the storyteller’s verbal and visual expressions, getting cues about the characters and how she should respond. These are audio and visual clues for children about the character’s feelings and these communication skills are critical to having empathy and responding to other people and storytelling is a good start to practicing.
Thirdly, stories are actually life experiences in disguise. Stories present challenges to the protagonist, and we follow as he goes through various emotions and chooses how to respond. Think about Jack and the Beanstalk, Cinderella and Hansel & Gretel… They are all characters who encounter a problem and figure out how to overcome it, either through ingenuity, getting guidance or through teamwork. The more stories your child is exposed to, the more virtual practice he is getting in life!
Peilin totally in her element. Look at how enthralled the kids are.
From your interactions with kids, how do you think they perceive fear and courage?
Children take their cues of what to be afraid of from adults. A child whose parent is terrified of dogs is likely going to jump away in fear when he hears a bark. On the same note, children learn about bravery from us adults too.
Stories are useful tools for helping adults share new, different or difficult scenarios to their young ones. The protagonist of the book acts as a role model, leading the way and showing how she handles the situation. Moreover, stories expose children to a variety of situations, so these are more familiar, and hence less scary, when encountered. Lastly, reading stories together is a starting point for discussions. ‘The End’ of the book can be the beginning of a dialogue, where your child learns from your experiences.
What are three books you’d recommend we read with our kids to build courage in them?
I’ll Catch You If You Fall
Don’t Worry, Little Crab
Brave Enough For Two
Three fantastic titles to read with your kids to build courage and show support. Photo: Lee Peilin
What these three books have in common we all have someone looking out and supporting us. These books are also particularly relevant for kids above 6, who are starting to be self-conscious and experience new situations.
Even as an adult reading these stories, I was reminded of the people who are my cheerleaders, whom I’m grateful for as I continue to try different things on my PositiveLeePeilin platform.
What’s the most important thing we can do as adults for kids, especially during these times when things seemed scary and uncertain?
The most precious thing you can give your child is your attention. I have parents who observe my workshops and are amazed how their kids are so chatty and comfortable with me by the end of the session. The secret? I ask the children questions and pay close attention to what they say. I write their answers on a board and we discuss why they think that way. I evolve my storytelling methods and sometimes even the storyline, based on what the children have shared. Paying 100% attention to your child, be it when you’re reading stories allowed together or chatting, sends signals that he matters. This is the biggest booster in confidence and self-worth, which helps one be stronger and more resilient when situations are new or uncertain.
You’re called PositiveLeePeilin, tell us some positives that have risen for you from this period of difficulties and uncertainty?
The time at home gave me focus to try new things which were not priorities previously. In the past four months, I’ve done live storytelling and interviews on Instagram Live and two national radio stations, recorded and edited longer creative videos, and fine-tuned the flow of my website.
Another big positive has been connecting with different friends, since video calls are now so ubiquitous. Conversations can also be more in-depth, without the distraction of food in front of us! I see and speak to my friends overseas more regularly now, as we make it a point to check-in on those who are living alone.
The third positive is getting to know a different side of myself: I’m an extrovert, so I expected to feel claustrophobic or cut-out from the world. However, I actually relish the lazier mornings, evening walks with my husband and the simplicity of planning each weekend.
Craft print-outs prepared by Peilin to complement her online story-telling.
One last question, isn’t story-telling without face-to-face interactions much harder?
In a way. Technical faults are my biggest nightmare, so I rehearse a lot with different equipment, timing transitions and prepare different types of activities so the children can remain engaged through the screen. I do miss seeing and hearing the children’s reactions and inputs to the stories, which I pay attention to and adjust to make my sessions more relatable and fun for them. That’s why I really appreciate the parents who have filmed their children’s enthusiastic responses and sent them to me after the session. Recently, I’ve focused a lot on creating simple crafts that parents can do with their children at home, so that the hands-on learning can still continue
Find out more about Peilin here or at her IG @PositiveLeePeilin. Log on to http://www.positiveleepeilin.com/crafts/ to check out her craft ideas.